I was in a cafe yesterday, just quietly writing a few notes, when the low murmur of conversation and the clinking of teaspoons against crockery was invaded by the penetrating American twang of a customer several metres away. Talking about how bad sugar is for you. (A recent revelation according to a couple of observations I made as I glanced up.)

Was it annoying? Yes.

Was I annoyed? Yes.

And it got me thinking. That person was completely oblivious as to the effect he was having on me. He was just going about his day, albeit in an annoying way. (Like the way Keira Knightley holds her mouth.) But really, it was my problem that I got annoyed.

Wouldn’t it be nice to never be annoyed by anyone? Ok, that may be aiming a little high, but wouldn’t it be nice to be LESS annoyed by annoying people? We all know people who talk or tweet every ten seconds about the annoyances they face at the hands of others, (which, in itself becomes quite annoying), and some of those things we really wouldn’t find particularly annoying ourselves and it seems a little like they’ve made being annoyed a hobby.

Fact: people who get annoyed easily by other people are, in general, less happy than those who don’t.

So here’s a thought. People are annoying, but we choose to be annoyed. Therefore we can choose NOT to be annoyed.

Hard? Perhaps.

Impossible? Certainly not!

Here’s a few tips:

Just decide in the moment – I’m not going to be annoyed by that.

Remember how annoying YOU can be (…hunting around for your hop card during rush hour commute with the whole bus staring at you, only to produce your visa and have to start the hunt again?)

Remedy the annoyance: if certain people’s twitter feeds annoy you, stop following them, if the hold times for ISP help lines are dragging, fold some washing or watch some telly, if the American in the cafe won’t shut up, put in your earphones… etc.

Laugh it off. There’s often something funny to be found in an annoying situation. Be a comedian for a moment.

Because, whether we like it or not, we are responsible for our own levels of annoyance. Annoying, but true.